What a waste of time, to hold my hand
A waste of love and affection
For most certainly, I am what I am
And you will always face rejection
My fiercesome conviction bids me to turn
Away from all hope of love
Sooner or later everyone learns
I strongly urge all to give up
I give what I can, only take what I must
And retreat into the world I created
And while all I hold dear crumbles to dust
My taste for pain remains unsated
A smile by day, a phantom by night
Haunting the halls of my lonely exsistence
A fragile bird always poised to take flight
Eternally weakened by my strongest defences
So where does that leave me? Cold and alone
Peering into the chasm I built for my heart
My unwavering pride has been carved out of stone
I rest miserably assured it will never break apart
The best of the worst is always my fare
Uncertainty is a most cruel beast
While some have been able to catch me unaware
Others have deemed me the worst of the least
So that leaves me here, scared and uncertain
Spirit always yearning to knock on the door
To finally tear back this immovable curtain
And joyfully find that there is so much more
More thah what I know, more than I see
So much more than I dared to hope for
Oh God if it's possible, please let there be
A chance to breathe and fear it all no more
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